Tamika Jean-Baptiste is an executive in the diversity, inclusion and belonging space. She is also a mother who is raising her young son with a strong, value-based multicultural identity.

In this episode of The Nine Oh Six, Tamika shares how her life experiences, role models and her 'village' have all shaped her into the strong leader and mother that she is today. Tamika also emphasizes to us that diversity is a reality, and inclusion is a behavior...and behavior needs to be exercised over time. And ultimately, we all are a byproduct of our own life experiences.

TRANSCRIPT

Meha: [00:00:00]

Tamika Jean-Baptiste is an executive in the diversity, inclusion, and belonging space in the pharmaceutical industry. She's also a mother who's focusing on raising her young son with a strong value based multicultural identity. In this episode of The Nine Oh Six, Tamika emphasizes to us that diversity is a reality, but inclusion is a behavior and behavior has to be exercised over time. And ultimately we all are a byproduct of our own life experiences.

Welcome to The Nine Oh Six podcast where we interview career-driven women who are mapping their own unique success stories, making impact in both their professional lives and in their communities. I am Meha Chiraya.

Archita: [00:00:51]

And I am Archita Fritz. We are two lifelong friends who are figuring out how we define success, both on and outside of the corporate ladder.

Meha: [00:01:00]

This episode with Tamika was recorded in early 2020, prior to the pandemic and social justice reawakening in the US. We met in New York City at Spotify's offices. Tamika's views are her own and not her employers.

Tamika, good afternoon.

Tamika: [00:01:18]

Good afternoon.

Meha: [00:01:18]

Thank you so much for joining me today here on The Nine Oh Six.

Tamika: [00:01:21]

Glad to be here.

Meha: [00:01:23]

So glad, you know, looking at this beautiful view.

Tamika: [00:01:26]

I don't know how you can focus, seriously.

Meha: [00:01:28]

From Spotify's offices, the Statue of Liberty welcoming us here, welcoming me to New York, back in New York.

Tamika: [00:01:36]

We're glad to have you in the NYC.

Meha: [00:01:38]

Tamika, so I wanted to start out by discussing with you. So today executive in the diversity inclusion space in the pharmaceutical industry. So what are things that you've done in your career Tamika,or that you hope to continue to do to champion women in the workforce.

Tamika: [00:01:57]

Absolutely not just women. I think, you know, there's such a wide palette of what like diversity means, because I feel like it's so funny just even last week, it's like, well, you gotta be careful cause you can't identify just too much in this work with African American, you know? And then I'm thinking like, well, am I just one thing?

Like, do I have to fit so neatly in a box? Right. Because I think we are a microcosm now of intersectionality of diversity, right? So African American, a woman, a transgender who may identify with some similar plights of me. My hope is that, you know, because we are so less, we so less fit in a box today and where our world is going and where, you know, and that's why I say there's a lot of resistance to that, right. So just opening that dialogue to get people to think about why does it have to be this or that, but how can I help people have those courageous conversations about what are the clear differences? What are the similarities? And what people will find out, there's probably more similarities than differences and how can we champion and be allies for each other in the global push forward.

Right. Cause I think we just think about it. Okay. It's the, okay, the women, as I've been an active, engager in most organizations, I've worked with a champion for women and things that need to be done. I found out in that journey, we can't do that without men. Right. So how do I bring men along in that journey to understand that this should be as important to you as it is to me. Because we can't fight it alone, some of the disparity and inequities in this world. When I think about African Americans guess what most of the pioneers in AfricanAmerican they weren't all African-American, you know, there were people across, you know, multiracial on boards of NAACP. It wasn't just colored people on the NAACP.

There were people and allies to the cause that made impact. Right? So as I think, big picture and what we can do is to me, it's like, let's stop trying to fit everybody in a box and understand where are those true disparities across several different things that we all intersect on and how do we create allies and champions along the way to make quicker, more meaningful, and sustainable change.

So that's how I kind of think about what is my role and how I've tried to be a mentor in helping people see that, understand it. And I always try to make myself approachable to do that because, hey, that's been a recipe for mine, my growth and my development as a leader.

Meha: [00:04:36]

So on that note though, how in order to cultivate allies, right?  There's, there's a group of people who seem to be aware, right. Or who come from within to want to support and be allies and be champions for change. But what about those who don't see the issue?

Tamika: [00:04:53]

Absolutely.

Meha: [00:04:54]

How do we engage them?

Tamika: [00:04:57]

That's a great question. And I think a lot of it is just having those courageous conversations. And I don't mean courageous like I have to get in your face and I don't, you see that there's, you know, gender pay gap, you know, it's not that. It's just like, cause again, I go back to lens and perspective. I have to appreciate that there may be just nuances and lack of awareness, not because you choose to be blind to certain things. It's like you just may not have line of sight to, because you don't have that lens.

Or you've never had that experience or you've never had it communicated in a way that makes you understand. Wow. I can see how that could be challenging. And that was a complete blind spot for me. Thank you for helping me. But I think it's typically when we engage in those awareness discussions, a: it's uncomfortable because you know, it's like we first approached like, Ooh, I don't know, are you an African American? Are you black? Am I going to say the right thing? It's okay to be uncomfortable. Those are the most productive conversations. So it's okay. And I think what we can do and what I've tried to do, let's just create that safe space. To understand first. And then what can you do to help that awareness kind of trickle a little forward?

And then I'm not asking you to rip a bandaid because I've always said this and I remember talking to you about it, Meha. I'm like diversity is a reality, but inclusion is a behavior and behavior has to be exercised over time. You don't become LeBron James, just by picking up the ball and bouncing, right.

Usually it takes practice. It takes conditioning to really create inclusivity, understand differences, appreciate it, and understand what your role is in helping to, if you're not an ally, become an ally. Or be a champion or speak up when you now know, Meha was telling me that this happens when women try to speak up and someone talks over them. I can speak up and say, ah, I think Meha was trying to say something, Meha, as simple as that now brings greater awareness to how you can help champion in a very small way. I think we think so big, but there's so many little things, just by understanding those nuances that we can do to make meaningful change in our own little environments and microcosm. So I try to not make it feel so daunting because it is a journey.

It's a journey. Conditioning is a journey. So how do you create that along the way?

Meha: [00:07:31]

I'm just curious when you think, within our country, within the US, people have such different experiences based on where they grew up. Based on where they work. I know your work has taken you kind of all over right East, West, South.

Are there any experiences you can reflect on where, where you felt that wow, there really is a difference in perception here versus somewhere else.

Tamika: [00:07:56]

Let's be clear growing up in the South. I mean, that experience has been me forever. I remember growing up and the word I would hear characterized by my mother and my sisters and my brother was, wow, she's unique.

You know? So here I was, this. African American child who loves Cyndi Lauper, who loved Huey Lewis and the news. So you can imagine little kids like me in Little Rock Arkansas was like, who are you? And I loved the orange lipstick too. So just for the record. But anyway, I remember kids who were from my neighbor was like, why, why are you talking white?

And I'm like what does that even mean? Like English is English. I didn't know there was a white version or a black version of it. So just growing up in the South, everything was just this or that to fit in a box. So that's just what the world was like. So then as I think about just how I've tried to shape what good looks like.

I remember one of my good girlfriends, her name was Mary Jane, and I remember going to her birthday party and I also loved The Monkeys. So we went to a concert in Memphis, Tennessee, and at mud Island. And I think I was the only black person in the entire theater and I love The Monkeys. Hey hey, we're the monkeys. We'll say we monkey around. I knew every song I used to watch the show, but again, I just, it was all a, I loved it. I didn't feel like I was like, I have clearly noticed I was the only one as an adolescent, but I think going back to, how do you create your uniqueness in a world that was trying to create your, this or that.

And how are you this intersection of you liked Cyndi Lauper, you live where predominantly African Americans live. Like what is this? So it's funny that even as I grow up, like I didn't, I was different. And I, and thankfully I had a mom that celebrated that difference when I came home and told her I'm like, mom, like the kids told me I'm a top white.

She said, what is that? She said don't and then she would see me slip to try to sound more like people in my neighbor. She said, no, no, no, no. You did, that's not, it's called English. Like there's no, there's no white version of it or black version of it. We just talk English. Right. So she encouraged me being unique, being comfortable with that.

I was taller the most people. So it was just, so again, going back to how we create those environments that gives our children the ability to be safe, feel comfortable in their authenticity because trust me, they are going to look around and go, well, wait a minute. Why is his hair like most people's hairs like this and mine is like that. Help them feel comfortable in you're unique celebrate that and how do you provide that confidence that to them, it's just Hey, this is me. Take me or leave me, you know? And if you want to understand it, I'm open to talk about what those unique differences are. Again, maybe it's just in my DNA, but that's how I grew up that has created kind of this again uniqueness of who I've come to be, which we all are. We are a byproduct of our life experiences. And I think we should celebrate that, embrace it and enjoy it. Enjoy where our journey has taken us and then what we've become.

Meha: [00:11:10]

Well said. So what do you feel has shaped your world view to get to where you are today?

Tamika: [00:11:16]

I would say, I think our life experiences shapes us for, I think what we're naturally purposed for. So, if you asked me when I was growing up, if I'd be an executive director in this space, I'd probably go up what space, right? But I think growing up in the South, so I was born in Little Rock, Arkansas.

I'm the youngest of five. For the most part of my life, my mom was a single mom raising five kids and the value of work ethic and really community and what I saw in my mom as this just natural inclination to give back. So despite where we were as a family, which I felt was awesome.

I asked my mom when I was older, like, wow we were poor, I didn't know. You know, because I had such a fruitful, loving, energetic, childhood, but when I really kind of introspectively you look back and say, wow, like how much she gave of herself. Despite maybe what she wanted or she never complained about what she didn't have, but very thankful for where we were, the love. And I just always saw her giving back in a capacity like, man, it's amazing, Oh, you need a place to say, come live with us until you get on your feet. That's just who she was. And she always still tells me to this day, there was always somebody there for us and I just love how you continue to look back and realize that as you've gone up, people have been there for you along the way and never forget that and always give back. So it just seems like a natural progression that as I think about this space of diversity and inclusion, and how do we create an environment that at the end of the day allows people to be who they are, allows people to think more about themselves and the community at large.

It's not surprising that I'm here. The journey has been fun along the way. So it makes sense. But if you'd asked me in my childhood where, I couldn't have told you this. It's been a fun journey.

Meha: [00:13:22]

Yeah. So it sounds like your mother has been a strong influence in your life. So tell me a little bit more about that specific experience.

Tamika: [00:13:31]

Yeah, it's amazing. So my father biological father was deceased for the most part of my adolescence. And again, I go back to the fact that I never heard my mom complaint really about anything. There was such an optimum about who she was. And again, a focus on just creating a loving environment that allowed us to be more outward focused than inward focused.

It's just something I remember. And she still maintains that spirit today. As siblings, I think we all give back in our way. I think about two of my brothers who were, kind of track superstars in their era and how now they go to high schools and children who are needing a connection to a male figure, a father figure and how they invest their time in retirement to give back to people who again, because they received that along their way. When I think about another brother who is a retired Lieutenant Colonel in the army, and he just couldn't stay retired. No I'm going to go to an underserved school in Memphis, Tennessee, and give back in junior ROTC for people who weren't getting kind of the love and attention and needed that male support.

So as I look across, even myself, siblings, it's not that we do it to say, Hey, look at me. It's just how we're wired and in our DNA. And the grounding factor in that for all of us was really my mom as a single mom that just instilled those values in us. That just makes that a natural part of who we are.

Meha: [00:15:04]

So speaking about kind of being wired, how are you, do you think shaping your own son to uphold the values that you think are most important?

Tamika: [00:15:15]

Yeah, that's so important because it all starts with your microcosm and the family and the people you surround yourself with. So as I think about the godparents we chose for him as I think about my husband's family and how their love of family and giving back even for the sake of themselves, it's almost like our union was kind designed and the cosmos, because our families are so similar in that regard. So the values that we're teaching my son, who's six years old. It's like, you know, his pop pop who loves him, who moved my husband from Haiti when he was five to seek a better life for his son.

He left the volatility of what was happening in Haiti and around the same age that my son is, brought his son to the US and tried to create a life for him that was better. So the thing that my husband and I are completely aligned in is we have a responsibility to our son to expose him to more, to expect more, and to create more from him, just like our parents did in their way. When I think about my mom, my mom is literally a generation, she quote, unquote, worked in cotton fields in the Delta of Mississippi. She got paid, but my grandmother did right. Literally one generation from a cotton field. So when I think about that in my husband's father, who my mom was. I mean, wow. I want to a higher bar, just like they wanted for us, for my son.

So it's very intentional that my husband and I a expose our son to a broader world beyond who we are. So I love our holidays because again, there's so much culture and food in our holidays, like, okay, we got Puerto Rican food, Italian food, we got Southern food, we got Haitian food, so he knows a wide palette of diversity and what that feels like.

And then secondarily, we also want to make him understand the value of where he is and what he has. So missions are important for us and we include him on those, right? So we go to Haiti and visit underprivileged schools and have our son as active as we are in giving backpacks and toiletries and necessities to kids who are less fortunate.

So it's important for us to create those same values in him, in a little guy that you keep him in his microcosm, it's a world of privilege. We were like, wait a minute, respect where you've come from and know that, your journey up requires, and there's an expectation to bring others along.

Meha: [00:17:53]

The one thing I was reflecting on, so I know that Haiti, for example, is a core part of your son's cultural identity. Right. What are additional ways I'd say, cause you mentioned food as an example and giving and making travels to Haiti, but what are other ways that you're helping shape his identity, would you say kind of on a day to day basis?

Tamika: [00:18:20]

That's a great question. And sometimes you don't really think about the, how until you reflect on it. So a few things, cause again, I don't think it's just Haiti. We say this and Chris and I are intentional about this as well. We really want to create a global perspective for him. So it's not just about Haiti, right? So when I think about our house is filled with music and music, I think is the universal language, no matter what language it is, right? Cause it's rhythm that brings you in. So I just think about the main level in our house is really about, we don't have a main TV there.

I have a small TV in my kitchen. That's rarely on, but it's about music. African music, it's Latin music. We listen to jazz. So he knows when jazz is on, mom, we need to study, that study music, right? So he associates an experience. So obviously a lot of Haitan music fills our Kompa, Zouk, so there's a plethora of music we like tap into that creates I think just a natural identity to things beyond who you are. So again, music was influential to me. It's so funny. My husband, he, that was one of the things that he was shocked that a girl from Little Rock, Arkansas even knew what Zouk and Kompa was.

She was like, he was looking through my iPod that lets you know how old I am. Oops, no one does that anymore. They dial into Spotify and get music, but he's looking at my iPod and thinking how do you know these artists? What affinity and how did you get connectivity to that in Arkansas?

Like, how did that even happen? So I've always kind of had this affinity for a world outside of my own and what I knew. And that's one of the ways I feel like that we're trying to create a lens for Sebastian and of course, travel, being a big part of that, seeing the world from a different lens. And so you have to kind of get out there and see it, you know, and not be influenced by what you know, books teach or what  TV shows, how do you create those experiences? So he can now shape his perspective. So we've been really intentional about that along the way, and hope to continue to do that and expand it.

Meha: [00:20:33]

Then speaking of global experience and the shifting back to kind of the professional view, what steps are you taking in your life or your work to continue to get some of those experiences?

Tamika: [00:20:44]

Yeah. That's, that's funny. So, you know, it's kind of one of those things where if you take just a moment to reflect, you're like, what did I just sign myself up for? So about two years ago, my husband and I were reflecting really, when we do this, every kind of New Year's Eve, we just kind of, you know, we have a quality dinner, we sit down and it becomes more reflective for us about all right, what have we done?  What are things in our lifetime we wish we had done? And how can we maybe prioritize and think about that to come? So I let it out of my mouth, wow, I never got my executive MBA. He was like what are you waiting on? I'm like, well, I have a child that's two going on three and life is crazy.

And my job requires so much travel, like how I was thinking more of the, how. And he was like and? If that's something you want to do, I'd never want you to look back and say, I should have. I could have and have regrets. So as I started researching programs, I'm like, Hey, what do I want to do to stretch out of my comfort zone and get a broader perspective beyond again, what I know.

So I intentionally chose a program that was global in every way and want just an executive program that we spent one week in China and we check a global box. I'm like, how do I find a program that's diverse. So I want it to pull deep and wide and be very intentional about the cohort that's brought together.

And then I want a global perspective the entire way. So I was fortunate to find a program like that. We're literally 69 people and the cohort about 27 countries represented. So you can imagine when your teams are formed, you're crossing your fingers going, Oh my God, please let it be time zones that are conducive for five people.

So we can meet at an optimal time. Right? But the content is rich. Like most executive MBA programs are, but the cultural experiences are understanding perspectives and nuances and how to work together and respect those differences. That to me has been, what's been invaluable about a program like this.

So that's just one of the ways that I continue to try to stretch myself to have more of a broader perspective and be again, a better global citizen overall.

Meha: [00:23:00]

It's like, you've got this opportunity. I mean, yeah. In, in life you get things that are somewhat partly based on luck. But it sounds like you really sought out this type of experience and it landed in such a memorable time.

Tamika: [00:23:15]

Yeah, it's been crazy. And obviously, you probably know this in your academic and professional career. These will be friends you will have for a lifetime. So, you know, it's pretty cool to think about.

So that's one thing we also get joy that as people travel, because we're all busy people in our professional careers. Anytime we travel, everyone's trying to outdo each other like, Oh, I'm at so, and so's house for a barbecue, you know? So it's just like, how can we outdo each other, where in the world is this class of 2020 and in our program. But I can see that continuing for years to come. So it's been cool in that regard.

Meha: [00:23:55]

So I like how we're jumping, reflecting from the personal to the professional. If I feel like things are very intertwined, you can't really separate completely our identities. So when I think about how, you know, raising my daughter and son, my goal really is to have them see the world, not just as tourists, but have an appreciation for local cultures. And you don't learn language as much as possible and beyond just their heritage of India. So then speaking of Sebastian, what are some experiences you've only tried to give him to get a glimpse of the broader world.

Tamika: [00:24:32]

Like I said, the gift of travel is one of the best gifts, because you can talk about it all day, but how do you really exposed? And we honestly, haven't done nearly enough international travel. Which I want to do more of. And now that he's older that becomes easier. I got to get him more used to main cabin versus economy class. Cause now he's just like, wait a minute, there's not a TV on the back of my seat. I'm like, wait a minute, calm down mister. Don't forget where you came from.

Meha: [00:25:03]

Well actually on that note, speaking of parenthood especially say as a new mom, reflecting back a few years ago, how did you make the adjustment to the new reality of being a career woman while also figuring out how to be a mom?

Tamika: [00:25:22]

Oh, wow. I think it's something we all go through in our own away. And I think a big part that helps us navigate that and try to figure out what's the best formula for us is our village too. So as I first thought about, yeah. Oh my goodness. I've literally, since he's been born, right.

So he's six. I probably had about four different roles in some way. Some of which covered half of the country. Some of which, it's just the Northeast, but I'm back and forth bi coastal often. And now I have the audacity to take on an enterprise wide role, which is like, Whoa. Okay. That's good.

Let's see what that travel schedule is going to look like. Right. But at the end of the day, it's been my support system. Because you know, in all transparency Meha, I think a lot of times it's us as women a lot of times, and I can only speak personally for me. I would almost go down the path of making limitations for myself a little bit to say, wow, this is half of the country, or this is a global role.

How can I do this with a young child and a family?  How it it's going to work. And then you let yourself get to a certain point and then you kind of stop and go do my counterparts think that way? How do I make sure that I'm getting more of a 360 view about what I'm about to go in and not make these mental restrictions about my ability to do it and be successful at it?

So going back to my village, my husband has been huge. I remember I probably wouldn't have taken on a role when my son was so young that covered half the country. I'm like, Oh my God but I'm still breastfeeding. And how am I going to get the milk? And I'm going through all this practical stuff.

And he asked me a very simple question that made me go pause. He said, would you have taken this job if you weren't married and had a child? And I quickly and easily said, yeah. And he was like, well what's the problem now? And I was like, good question. So it just, it took me out of that downward spiral of, I think what I, and some women consider as what, all the things that we have to consider because we're women and they're real things. How are you going to get the milk back? That's a real thing. Guess what? I'm not the first person who's done it. And I won't be the last and with resources and your village and tech that can be done very easily.

So that's kind of how I think I've been supported in a way that has allowed me to not put those mental restrictions on myself or even go and a lot of times they're not middle restrictions. It shakes you down like an anxiety path that you can save that energy, right. Put into something more productive versus I just spent a whole day like wondering how this is going to be done and guess what it'll figure itself out.

So that's kind of how I think about it. But he's been a great support in that regard. And so has our village. You know, grandparents and aunts and godmothers, like life just happens to have a way of helping you figure it all out and go forward. I learned that the older I get.

Meha: [00:28:34]

Cause sometimes I also think about the comfort of the village, right? Tamika, because it's not just having that support system, but what you're saying, sometimes you need that nudge to leverage that support system.

Tamika: [00:28:49]

Which I don't think. I fully appreciated the value of early on in my career, because I think the more you are called to a higher responsibility, I think the more you do need to tap into those trusted resources that you have built along the way to really take on that responsibility, to the magnitude that you need to do.

Like this journey has not been for not, you have not picked up people along the way that you've trust and you've gained value from that have imparted the wisdom and knowledge, not to say everybody's gone along on the journey. You will clearly know those folks that will be those trusted resources along the way. The higher you get, the more you need to make sure that you tap into when appropriate those folks that are willing and more than willing and able to provide that support when you need it.

Meha: [00:29:43]

So actually tell me a little bit more about those trusted resources, right? Cause some of us listening to the podcast right now might be still in the journey of figuring out who those people are. So how do you, in a sense cultivate that?

Tamika: [00:29:58]

I think there are, there are natural ways they happen. Much, like I mentioned earlier, and I've heard you even speak about, you know, people you've met along your journey and that you still connect with.

And again, not to say that you have to connect with them. Yeah. Oh, I've got to call him every six months or every year. Right? Because at the end of the day, like people you truly connect with in a meaningful way. It doesn't matter if you call them five years from now, there was something about that interaction and that connection and an established credibility in that moment that when you do reach out, you don't have to like, Oh, why didn't you call me for five years?

And you don't have to like, do all that over again. It is established and if you need it, you can always  pull that out of your relationship, Rolodex and leverage when you need to, without a lot of energy and like oh I have to make up for lost time. Like those calls I have to make are exhausting.

And those people in your life where that has to happen. But I can think of right now of a mental Rolodex that if I pick up the phone since college to now of people, we don't have to recreate this long pathway of experiences. The experiences we had and what we established.

If I need something to something in this region, it's established and you would be more than willing to help connect the dot for me, period. To leverage that for what it is and keep going. So I think there are going to be some people that will be in your core that go along that journey, there will be relationships and experiences established that you'll be able to pick from and leverage when needed, but we just have to be open to saying which can be challenging. And it has meant for me to just say, I need help. I think we want to try to do it all and just let me just keep packing on my buffet of all this stuff. I got to juggle what, without really leveraging our resources, which I feel like sometimes our male cohorts do a lot better.

How do you really pull to, to get what you need when you need it to help you make this journey just a little simpler as that responsibility and calling becomes greater. That's how I feel about it.

Meha: [00:32:04]

So, Tamika, how would you define success?

Tamika: [00:32:09]

To me, I think success, cause again, it goes back to what we've been talking about.

I think it's really you shaping what good looks like for you andd by what good looks like something that allows you to just stretch yourself just a little bit more past our comfort zone. Because again, a lot of life's limitations, both personally and professionally really have more to do with our limitations than any granted, there are some clear things, things that allow that limit true progression. I don't want to ignore the institutionalized kind of things that are in play that do limit and you have to push against. But when we think about just even before we even get to the ceiling of that push sometimes, and we talked about how I've experienced that in my own personal life. There were certain times that I would have probably limited myself before the ceiling, the proverbial ceiling limited me. Here is what I desire and aspire towards now, how can I stretch myself a little bit this year? And then the next year and the next year to build more confidence, to truly kind of first pass by some of our mental limitations and truly hit the ceiling.

And now let's now push on the real resistance to get to what what's truly in store for us, as we build allies and champions along the way. To me again, I don't want to put success and a box for people, what your aspirations and your dreams are, may look very different than what mine is.

And I think just as long as you kind of stretch past your comfort zone a little bit more each day to get to what the aspiration of where you dream, because I totally believed in it dreams and what you aspire for and how do you have a vision? Cause I feel like you need something in the horizon.

Or like a true North, and this is great as we see it, this beautiful view, and I can see a horizon. Um, I just think there's something that should pull us forward. So how do you just stretch a little bit more to kind of get to some of those things you desire? So to me, that is what success is and I think sometimes it gets misconstrued with, I gotta be a chief this or C suite, and I've got to make this much money and I've got to drive this kind of car.

That's not what it is for me. Cause I feel like. The joy, the karma that comes with just you being others focused and kind of on your path of what success looks like for you, all that stuff that gives you that joy, the reward and the positive experiences that you will create. Lifetime impressions will come.

So it'll happen. So that, to me, that's my philosophy on success. And it's something that, you know, thank goodness. My definition of success in a box wasn't met because I would have limited what truly what's in the horizon and what I'm more purposed for probably wouldn't have happened. So just want to stretch a little more every year.

Meha: [00:35:17]

Love it. It sounds like you have the support system and your partner to help you reflect every year to figure out okay, this is what I think I can do. And he's like, wait, no, that's a little bit more Google will have farther to that horizon.

Tamika: [00:35:32]

And I think it's reciprocal too, as we think about that's what partnerships are for. I think a lot of times we think, Hey, we have the husband and wife partnership, we stretch and all day long, if it's a business partnership, like, alright, we met 1.2 billion this year, how do we meet two point? We're always stretching in business. So why not help each other stretch as a unit? Cause it was so funny as my husband, he was talking about taking on a new role with promotion and basically running Japan and Asia.

Okay the requires some unique hours beyond the hours I've been experiencing. And I remember encouraging him. I'm like, well, Hey, you were all in with me for the last one 20 plus months on my executive MBA. Granted it's grueling hours, but we'll make it work. Let's go for it. Let's figure it out. I'll say anybody can do something before a year, year and a half.

I say it goes by like this. So, you know, I think at times it's this reciprocation because at the end of the day, you're coming together as a unit, you're building a partnership like most businesses. What partnership doesn't want to stretch if one does. But think about how exponential, the output as a unit and the impact as a unit would be if you're stretching each other and supporting that along the way.

So that's just how we kind of ebb and flow. And I'm fortunate in that regard. It took me, you know, coming to New York, which I was totally not looking for a husband to actually uncover that. So it's been cool, but the journey, even in a personal sense.

Meha: [00:37:01]

So the question, Tamika, that we ask our guests on the show, What do you love about yourself?

Tamika: [00:37:09]

I love that I am comfortable in who I am becoming. I'm okay with lessons learned. So I'm comfortable with allowing myself to make mistakes, learn from them, grow from them. And more and more each day, I truly feel like I am coming in more and more into my authentic self finding my authentic voice, not having to hide that and shield that to try to assimilate into what norm is. I'm becoming more comfortable in kind of going against what norm is and saying, you know, even more so just becoming in my age and my wisdom. I'm just a bit more authentic and open to understanding more learning more and,just letting people see who I am and who I am becoming.

So that's what I like about myself.

Meha: [00:38:09]

Wonderful. Wonderful. Anything else you want to cover? Any other story you want to share?

Tamika: [00:38:14]

No, I think I have a question for you.

Meha: [00:38:16]

Yeah I haven't gotten, I haven't had this happen before.

Tamika: [00:38:20]

What is, what would you say cause I love the platform, that you and your friend have created, with this. And what are you getting out of these experiences? You've had a few now and you've talked to a phenomenal group of women already and their stories. Can you speak to what you're gaining out of this experience thus far? Cause I think it's awesome.

Meha: [00:38:51]

I think it's a couple of things. So I think it's these moments themselves.

Of connecting with you, connecting with people in our communities on a level that you might not do when you're just having a drink or having coffee. When you actually are encouraging and allowing each other to get deep, to really see where you came from, because that itself, I think has it's own feeling of inspiration for each other.

Yeah. So that, and I think the second piece though, Tamika is speaking of limits, what we can do. This is helping me push myself. And so what I can do, being a mom again, for the second time. Working and, trying to focus on my family. But I realized that there's a part of my identity where I feel that I can contribute something to others and maybe that is helping others share their stories with the world.

Tamika: [00:39:53]

Wow.

Meha: [00:39:54]

Thank you so much Tamika for being our guest on The Nine Oh Six.

Tamika: [00:39:57]

Absolutely, glad to be here. All the best.

Meha: [00:40:02]

To learn more about our podcast, check us out at thenineohsix.com. The Nine Oh Six is produced in Meha Chiraya and Archita Fritz. Subscribe to us on your favorite podcast platform to tune in and hear the stories that will elevate and inspire you.