Meet Courtney Boehrer, the founder of Team HeartStrong and a successful global HR professional. She reflects on life as an open heart surgery survivor, facing severe body image issues, apprehensions of leaving a 15-year corporate career, and how her defining moments shaped her new lease on life to ultimately be a coach and empower others with embracing their strengths - while leading with healthy and strong.

TRANSCRIPT: Episode 3 - Leading with the Heart to Redefine Strong

[0:02]

Courtney: At age 10, I started to have chest pains. And we found out very, very abruptly that I had four holes in my heart and that I needed to have emergency open heart surgery.

[0:13]

Meha: You're listening to Courtney Boehrer. Welcome to The Nine Oh Six. I'm Meha Chiraya.

[0:19]

Archita: I'm Archita Fritz.

[0:21]

Meha: We're your hosts for The Nine Oh Six, a podcast where we elevate the stories of extraordinary women in our communities. The Nine Oh Six is where friendship began the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. Each season on The Nine Oh Six you'll hear stories from nine women. Today, we're very excited to welcome Courtney Boehrer. Courtney is a global HR professional, who has over 15 years of experience coaching leaders and teams to utilize and maximize their strengths. Courtney is a leader, founder, and coach of Team HeartStrong, where she engages and empowers men and women with the power of fitness and nutrition. Courtney is married to her high school sweetheart, and they have two daughters. They currently reside in Chicago. Please join us in welcoming our next guest, Courtney Boehrer to The Nine Oh Six.

[1:21]

Archita: Hello, Courtney, welcome to The Nine Oh Six, how are you today?

[1:26]

Courtney: Hi, I'm good. Thanks for having me here.

[1:28]

Archita: Courtney. So we're gonna get right into this. So you recently stepped away from a very successful corporate career of over 15 years in various global human resource, HR, roles. Was there something you learned in the early part of your career that you had to unlearn in the latter part of your career?

[1:51]

Courtney: So absolutely. I started my career right out of college and at the beginning of my career a couple of people gave me the advice that you've got to give it your all 100%. And if you don't, then you're not going to be successful. And I still agree that you need to give it your all and you commit to something. But what that doesn't mean is that in your career, you have to give your full self. And I had to change that mindset because I went for several years at the beginning of my career, thinking that I had to give every part of me to that business and to my to my HR career, and that's not necessarily true.

[2:33]

Archita: Courtney, truer words have never been said. Talking about family, I love how involved your kids are in joining you in and all those fabulous workout videos. Courtney, I'm curious to learn more about how your journey as a coach, as a fitness enthusiast evolved, and what is your vision for this team that you call Team HeartStrong, a fabulous fitness team that you have co-founded.

[3:05]

Courtney: Yeah, such a good question. So I'll back up just a little bit to paint a little bit of a picture. But at age 10, which is crazy, because my oldest daughter is going to be 10 in just a few months. At age 10, I started to have chest pains. And I'm going to fast forward very quickly through a lot of tests and medical situation. And we found out very abruptly that I had four holes in my heart and that I needed to have emergency open heart surgery. I probably get a little emotional, especially thinking how my parents must have felt because gosh, I think about my kids being that age, but anyhow, I had open heart surgery. The great news is it went very well. It was at a time where the risk of possibly dying or it not working was a little higher than it is today. Thank goodness medical technology has advanced, but it was successful. I was home schooled for many months. I obviously couldn't do any physical activity, but at the end of the day, it went well. And I was eventually, after years, given the clearance to do anything I wanted. So I share that because I really view that as my second chance. And I was given a chance to not only live but to share the importance of health. And for me fitness to anybody I possibly could first and foremost, my family. So hence Team HeartStrong. I'm all about hearts. And that's really where the team came from. I absolutely love fitness. Fast forward. So that was age 10. I'm going to give one more little piece of context. Fast forward to college. So I went to college at the University of Dayton. And I actually went there on an academic scholarship, which was just incredible, but I also went there because I wanted to be on their dance team. I was a dancer, and I was so excited and I showed up on day one and learned that they canceled or removed the dance team. On the first day of college. I'm thinking it was terrible. I just felt like the world was ending now. It wasn't but I felt like it was. So I decided I still want to continue doing something that I enjoy. So I was also a cheerleader in high school. So I decided to try out for cheerleading. Wasn't my first passion, but it was fun to me. So I tried out. And this is where the moment came in where unfortunately, it's still very vivid in my mind. I did not make the cheerleading squad. Now I was blessed through most of my life to make a lot of the teams that I tried out for. I was very blessed that way, but I didn't make it but that wasn't as much the issue. The issue was is the lady who told me I didn't make it looked me in the eye and said, "You didn't make the squat because you're too fat". I gotta stop for a minute because this always brings brings me to tears because unfortunately, it's vivid. I had never heard that before. I was very blessed that I didn't have any big body image issues in high school or any of those things. It affected me more than I ever thought it would. So my personality is okay I'll show you but unfortunately the way in which I decided to quote unquote, show this lady that I wasn't too fat and should have made the squad was to stop eating. And, unfortunately take on eating disorder type of activities, mainly not eating enough. I dropped a lot of weight, it was tough. I lost a lot of friends, honestly, in that that's on me. It was rough. Now, the positive is, I have a lot of great people in my life that stayed by my side. But it's never gone. But I fought through it and so my motto in life and if I can do anything is to spread the importance of healthy and strong especially to my kids, so that they never, ever have to experience the feeling or being told that they're fat. Fat is literally a bad word in our house, we do not use it, then I have done what I can in this world and healthy and strong can mean physically it can be mentally, it can mean so many things. But that moment in life was a trigger. That's what Team Heart strong is really about. Fitness is the way in which I like to work, portray it. Obviously, nutrition is important and mental health is important. And there's so many things, fitness just happens to be my passion as well. But that's what HeartStrong is about. It's about supporting each other, it's about loving each other and the word fat is not used. It is not used. And my kids know that. And I will never change my mind about that. And that's how the team has emerged. And I'm building a team of strong men and women who care about each other, love each other, want to be healthier and happier, and it is just a gift just to be a part of something like that.

[7:43]

Archita: Courtney, thank you for sharing that. Those were two pretty defining moments. One that gave you a second chance in life and the second one that really challenged that very sense of self that you had developed over the years, but kudos to you for actually using those moments to empower yourself, your family, and others out there in the world. So Courtney, what would your advice be to somebody who feels like they're being bullied?

[8:15]

Courtney: So first and foremost, people have opinions of other people that unfortunately, can be negative, can bring you down, and they don't matter. Now, that's hard. But it's hard to think that way. Because a lot of times and I am the same way at times, I care what people think about me, but at the end of the day, you are you and that is what is special. And I believe that if I had taken the approach of talking about that particular moment, a little bit sooner with somebody that I trusted, and didn't allow somebody who I didn't even know get into my head, I may not have gone down that path. Now, I wouldn't trade it because so much has gone come out of it, I really believe that. But I do think I could have talked about it, either with a professional or maybe against somebody that I trusted sooner, as opposed to keeping it to myself, and allowing those words to define what I was going to do next in my life. If you don't have that person that you can trust, I'd recommend finding that person, or listening to a podcast like this or reading a book that maybe speaks to you that talks about a similar situation. Because believe it or not, there's a lot of people and if you're thinking about giving advice to people, there's a lot of people who are feeling the exact same way you may not know it. And it helps if you can relate to somebody. The minute that I found people who shared a similar story, even if in part, for whatever reason, it makes you feel a little bit better, and you can talk openly about it and you don't feel like there's something wrong with you. We're human, we all have our battles. Everybody's going through a battle. So finding that support system, to me is critical, and it's if you're feeling bullied or somebody is making you feel down, find somebody to talk to or personal development to read, it will help. And don't wait. Don't wait for 10 years and then have to catch up.

[10:16]

Archita: Courtney, as you speak about support system, was there somebody or a group of people to help you cope with what you were going through?

[10:28]

Courtney: Yes. So there have been a few people that have become that support system; however, they didn't come until a little bit later in life. So do I wish that maybe I would have found them sooner, maybe even in college? Yes, but I did find them. And there's one in particular that has become my very best friend, who not only could relate, but didn't make me feel like I had done anything wrong in the past. Instead, helped me feel like I am Courtney. I am the person that I meant to be. And when I'm around this person, I myself, I don't worry about eating too much or eating too little and those sorts of things. I'm just me. And that has been life changing.

[11:13]

Archita: Courtney, a key takeaway there for me was finding that somebody as soon as possible, and just reaching out to ask for help sooner rather than later. So Courtney, if we take a step back, I'd like to peel back the layers a bit on that defining news you got as a 10 year old. You're at a swim meet, you're loving life, and all of a sudden you find out well, you can't hang out with your friends, you can't go to school, you can't do all the things you love to do because well, you're going to be in surgery. Specifically open heart surgery. What was that like and what kind of support system did you have back then that has shaped both you and the people involved with that for years to come?

[12:01]

Courtney: Yes, so what a defining moment. So the great news is the minute that we found out what was going on, I had support around me first my families. So I'll start with my sister. My sister is two years older than me, and I can still remember and it was actually before the surgery, she looked at me and said, "Courtney, I'm going to be a doctor because of this". And what's really cool is she's a doctor. She is an ER doctor she followed through, but I share that because that connection, that love, that trust, and also giving me the belief that the doctors were going to be able to help me was amazing. That will always be special to me. My mom and dad are the most caring giving people in the world. We are very close our families very close, I talk to my mom like four times a day still, that's just how we are. It's in this moment where I actually saw my dad cry for the very first time. And I can still picture it. It's so vivid in my mind. I can remember what my mom was wearing the day I went into surgery. But they were by my side every moment. My mom would not leave the room. Of course, she wasn't allowed in the operating room, but she would not leave the room in the ICU. Friends, family from outside of Indiana, which is where the surgery was at Riley Children's Hospital. Gosh, I have a picture where it's just balloons upon balloons upon stuffed animals that have friends that came in and visited me and after as well. Being homeschooled and not near your friends, I thought my life was ending. I didn't get to go to dance. I didn't get to swim. I didn't get to do all those things. But people came to me. My teachers came to me. I was very studious at that time, too. They came to me and gave me my tests at home. I don't think I could have gone through it without the support system around me. And it's just so interesting because I'm thinking about that right now. And I can picture it all in my head and we didn't have as much technology, even then. Of course we took pictures but it's so vivid. It's obviously defined me even more than I probably knew,

[14:03]

Archita: Courtney, what really intrigues me is that you've taken these defining moments. And you're not letting them define you in a way in which they hold you back. But you're leaning into them essentially, to pay it forward wherever you can. How has being a coach defined and helped you in other aspects of your life?

[14:28]

Courtney: So I view myself as a coach everywhere: a coach for my kids, a coach for my husband, a coach at work, a coach for health and fitness. I wake up every day truly wanting to inspire others in any way I can. And the defining moments I've had through open heart surgery and through battling an eating disorder as two examples have allowed me to be who I am express myself and again, help show others. And although work can be hard, there are times when you're in a career, as many people probably know or are experiencing for the first time where it's hard. Maybe you have a boss that's tough. Maybe you just don't know what to do with your career. Maybe you just had a kid. As a coach, I'm able to talk to and with people and focus on their strengths and help them realize that even though times are tough, you have a ton of strengths and you have a ton of potential and what we need to do is just find that right thing that matches those strengths. That's what I get to do. And it's my defining moments that give me the energy and the passion to do it with a smile on my face. It doesn't feel like work. Work doesn't feel like work. Team HeartStrong doesn't feel like work. Being a mom doesn't feel like work. Am I tired at the end of the day? Yes, but the energy and the passion I have around it just keeps me going.

[15:51]

Archita: So you had another decent defining moment when you decided to step away from your 15 year successful global HR career and move to Chicago. Were there any apprehensions, as you made this next big change in your life?

[16:07]

Courtney: Yes, so leaving a 15 year career and an incredible company is hard. I'm still going through the change curve. It was only three weeks ago. Now the good news is I don't have regret. And that's a lesson. You don't want to have regret. And I don't feel any regret. But I do feel worry, changes hard, not necessarily knowing what's next is hard. But I knew in my heart that it was time for me to take all of the amazing things that I've learned and all of the growth that I've had in my HR career and through health and fitness, learning and coaching, and pay that forward somewhere else and continue to grow my career in a different way. And continue to make sure that I can be focused on my family how I'd like to. I am exploring what's next in regards to my HR career right now. Do I have moments of oh my goodness? Yes, that's all I have known for a very long time. New Beginnings are Hard Change is hard. But I'm excited. I'm at the point of excitement right now as to what what I can do to pay it forward even more in the community here in Chicago and then beyond.

[17:10]

Archita: Speaking of new beginnings, Courtney, do you think women can have it all in the corporate world?

[17:17]

Courtney: I think women can. I think you can have what you view as all, but your all is going to look different than somebody else's. What I've learned, and I didn't always think about it this way is my quote unquote, all is not going to be the same as another male or female, let's just say maybe in the corporate world. But for me, I've been able to define what is all to me, and how do I make that happen? Now, again, there are compromises there are absolutely compromises but if you identify the things that are most important to you, then it won't feel like a compromise. I can be the very best mom that I can possibly be. I can be career focused. I can focus on my health and fitness. I just have to prioritize that means other things kind of go by the wayside. I don't watch a lot of TV. Luckily, I don't really like it, but I don't watch a lot of TV. I don't go out a lot. I'm a little bit of a homebody. That's my choice. So my all is defined by me and I have to be okay with that. And we as we as women, women growing our careers have to be okay that are all might not look like the all next door or the all in a different leadership office. You get to define that. And if we remember that, we will be successful, and we will be happy. And to me that thing incredibly important.

[18:39]

Archita: Speaking of success, Courtney, how do you define success?

[18:44]

Courtney: Very good question. So success is a combination of things for me. Success is happiness and I didn't use to say that. I've learned that throughout my career. Combine that happiness with achieving the goals that you've set out to achieve that success. Happiness and achieving the goals, not just achieving the goals, because if you achieve goals and you're miserable, or they don't give you a feeling of satisfaction, then to me the success is it's not a success. It's not worth it at all. And you have to define those goals as well. I have to and continue to define the goals of what success looks like. I've had those goals throughout my entire career and that's what I can aim for. But it comes along with happiness too.

[19:34]

Archita: Speaking of goals, Courtney, was there a recent goal that you checked off the to feel really great about?

[19:42]

Courtney: Team HeartStrong is what I'd call a quote unquote side gig business. I did not set out and I still honestly don't set out for Team HeartStrong to be focused on making money or income producing however it does. And I should not shy away from that and just recently, we achieved a huge goal in which we became what's called a leadership team within our business network. And we just achieved it a couple of weeks ago. And it's a combination of all of the team and it's icing on the cake. I'd do it anyway, Team HeartStrong would exist either way. But I guess it's icing on the cake to know that I can provide even more for my family while doing something that I'm truly passionate about.

[20:23]

Archita: So Courtney, switching gears, has it been tough juggling two full time careers between Greg and yourself? as you pursue being a coach, fitness enthusiast, a global HR professional, all while the both of you are moving across 10 different cities?

[20:38]

Courtney: Yes. I've painted a picture of some really great moments in our life. But there's also been moments that have been very tough. The first and foremost when you have two careers in the household and you have kiddos. There's sick kids, there's business travel, there's school events, and sometimes you just don't know how you're going to cover it all. And sometimes you've got to find people to help you out. You don't have family that has lived nearby, ever. Now we've had parents, my mom and dad have lived within two or three hours. So they're, they're saving grace. But you have to find different support systems. And there are definitely moments where one of us has to just give and has to go take care of something because you have a sick child, you have to take care of your sick child. And that can be very stressful. We've also had to go through decisions and work in regards to career and where we may possibly move or different career changes or career promotions to see how we can manage it within the family. So there have been times where Greg, my husband, has left his job in order to move for me and found another one. And that's not easy. Our move back to Chicago here was partly driven by the fact that Greg was working from Chicago while we were in Michigan. He got a promotion and we didn't want to be apart anymore. The girls and I were in Michigan for one year where Greg was in Chicago except for on the weekends, that's hard. We made the decision along with a lot of other things that we needed to be and wanted to be back together. And that came with a lot of tears and a lot of anger and stress and all of those things. But it's something that comes along with building two careers and deciding that that's important to you.

[22:20]

Archita: Courtney, that is so refreshing to hear. Because between juggling two careers, kids and multiple moves, it's important to just embrace the fact that it is not going to be easy and no walk in the park. But if you can stay aligned to those values you set as a family and to what you as a family defined as being your all you will be able to move forward and forge your paths ahead.

[22:49]

Courtney: Exactly. Trust me, there's plenty of tears, days where I just don't even want to get out of bed at times. Now again, I've got a lot of passions to get me up and going and kids right. But it's not easy. I'm a crier. I've had tears in the last three weeks it's real. And again, you just have to find people who you can relate to and talk to so that you don't bottle it up.

[23:11]

Archita: Courtney, you said you're a crier. So let's peel that back a bit and step into the workplace. How do you manage your emotions being the passionate person that you are?

[23:21]

Courtney: I've learned to express my emotion more naturally than I did at the beginning of my career. So I'll be the first to say that I refrained from too much emotion at the beginning of my career, maybe because I thought that that was the right thing to do, or that was because other people were doing it. But I learned through time and through continued career growth and obviously strengths and development that I needed to be myself. Now don't get me wrong. I am not somebody who walks into the office and just starts crying. That's not how I operate. I'm able to work through a lot of very difficult situations in HR as you can imagine, with a heart but not with outward emotions like crying and those sorts of things. To me, as long as the decisions that are being made and are ethically correct, then I can move through very tough situations without crying. Now, with that being said, when a situation happens at work that is a little bit more personal, I have cried at work. And I have in the past beat myself up about it, but now I don’t. Now, again, there's a time and a place. But if there's an opportunity, or a time in which it makes sense, and you want to express your emotion, and I use crying as an example, maybe it's not crying, maybe it's energy around something. If you believe in it, then I say go for it. And if people are going to judge you for that, then let's have a different conversation about your career. Now be smart. You don't want to just cry every day or be so energetic about every single topic, but if there's certain things you should express how you feel. And if you're in a workplace where you can't express how you feel, then maybe that's not the right workplace for you

[24:59]

Archita: Courtney very well said, a lot of times people bottle in their passions or bottle their emotions because of potential repercussions. But that comes to haunt you later.

[25:08]

Courtney: Yeah, it's interesting. I mean, again, a requirement to become more confident in your own self is, it's just required in order to be okay with expressing your emotion. Now, I say that there are definitely workplaces where that's just not acceptable. And if you're the type of person that wants to be able to express yourself in a certain sort of way, then that's when you have to really reassess that. But at first comes with just being confident in who you are. And I was not from a career perspective, always confident in who I was and what my opinions were as an HR business professional. Now I am, that comes with time, but you do have to be confident in who you are and find the right place for you in order to express yourself how you like to express yourself.

[25:54]

Archita: So Courtney, you have two little girls, Hayden and Peyton. As we talk about confidence and emotion, and passions, what would your words of advice be to them if we were to fast forward 10 years from today and they're leaving home for college.

[26:09]

Courtney: So Hayden and Peyton are my world. And as they go to college, first of all, that's a scary thought, right? As they go to college, but it's gonna sneak up. The most important piece will be that there might be pressure, that they might not necessarily know where they fit in. But to always stick to the core part of it to the belief of who you are as a person and remain confident in who you are. Remain confident in the strength that you have. And remember that nobody around you can can define who you are and that they have strengths and that they are leaders and not to allow other people to make them feel otherwise.

[26:58]

Archita: Courtney, if you were to reflect and think about who has instilled that confidence you have within yourself, who would be that biggest influence in your life?

[27:08]

Courtney: So it's hard to pick between two, my mom and my sister, but I will go with my sister. She is my hero, not only in the way in which she befriends me, she's my best friend but also the achievements that she's had in her life. I had mentioned she is an ER doctor. She started a residency at Greenville Health System where she created it from scratch and now it's highly successful. She has one little girl through IVF and she is pregnant with her second through IVF. So she's had a lot of struggles through IVF, but it's been just miracles. So she's she's going to have another little girl in December.

[27:51]

Congratulations, that's exciting! You will be an aunt again.

[27:54]

Courtney: I know Aunt Courtney, Aunt Nene, I'm Nene. She is also a fitness coach. She teaches group fitness. She is just an incredible person. And I love her to death.

[28:08]

Archita: Courtney, sisters are really special and hands down my sister is my hero as well. So one of the questions we ask, every guest on the show is, what do you love the most about yourself? So Courtney, what do you love the most about yourself?

[28:24]

Courtney: I love my heart, and I'm not trying to be cliche. But I am one who has so much passion and love in my heart, not only to share with others and to care for others, but to achieve really big goals that means so very much. I love that about me. I love that passion and that strength of heart that guides me every single day.

[28:49]

Archita: With that we come full circle. Courtney, thank you so much for joining us on The Nine Oh Six. It's been fascinating to hear how you've used your defining moments to empower yourself and build a great community with Team HeartStrong. We wish you the very best as you write the next chapter, both your coaching career and your HR career. Thank you, Courtney.

[29:11]

Courtney: Thank you. I'm honored to be here and what an incredible experience hoping I can pay it forward and inspire others just like you're doing, so thank you.

[29:21]

Meha: To learn more about our podcast. Check us out at thenineohsix.com. The Nine Oh Six is produced by Meha Chiraya and Archita Fritz. Subscribe to us on your favorite podcast platform to tune in and hear the stories that will elevate and inspire you.