The Devil Emails at Midnight: Unmasking Bad Bosses & Broken Systems with Mita Mallick
We’ve all had that moment - the dreaded midnight email. Whether it’s a sudden request that shatters your rest or a scolding note disguised as “feedback,” those after-hours messages often say more about your boss than the job.
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In Episode 93 of the Embracing “Only” podcast, bestselling author and corporate changemaker Mita Mallick returns to unpack how toxic leadership behaviors thrive - and how we can interrupt the cycle. Her new book, The Devil Emails at Midnight: What Good Leaders Can Learn from Bad Bosses, is a call to name, reflect on, and learn from the devils we’ve all worked under.
In this blog post, we’re covering the following:
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1) When Inclusion Gets Personal
Mita doesn’t just study leadership - she lived the consequences of exclusion from the start. Her earliest experience with racism was a jarring wake-up call to identity and belonging:
“She said, ‘My parents said I’m allergic to the color of your skin. You can’t get on my bike.’ And I was in the first grade. I felt this shame, like I had done something to hurt her. I didn’t think those childhood experiences from the neighborhood would follow me into corporate America, but they did.” - Mita Mallick
This gut-punch moment mirrored the shame many women of color later feel in the workplace, apologizing for things we didn’t cause and shrinking ourselves to fit toxic systems.
2) Why Good People Become Bad Bosses
Mita explains that bad boss behavior doesn’t happen in a vacuum. There are usually three culprits: marketplace pressure, toxic leadership above, or personal struggles at home.
“Usually, there are three things going on: something’s happening in the marketplace, something’s happening with their boss, or something personal is going on.” - Mita Mallick
It’s not an excuse, but it is an invitation. An invitation for peer intervention, curiosity, and empathy. If you see someone unraveling at work, Mita urges you to “be the mirror.”
“If someone is dropping F-bombs or acting out, ask, ‘Are you okay?’ Often, people need that check-in to see they’re behaving badly.” - Mita Mallick
3) The Beloved But Incompetent Boss (And Why Women Don’t Get That Grace)
One of the most frustrating dynamics in corporate life is watching underqualified men ascend based on potential, while overqualified women of color are asked to prove themselves tenfold.
“Do women have the same privilege to be likable but incompetent? How long would we tolerate that?” - Mita Mallick
This isn’t just annoying - it’s destructive. As Olivia noted during the episode, when we push someone into leadership before they’re ready, we set them - and their team - up to fail.
“ We are actually hurting the talent by moving them forward too soon. They're going to have an awful experience. No one wants to feel like they're failing at work, and we think we're being nice,” - Olivia Cream
Mita urges HR leaders to challenge bias masked as generosity.
Ask:
What skills are missing?
Is there an onboarding plan?
Or are we just hoping for the best because we like them?
4) Diversity Under Siege - and Why We Must Protect Our Energy
Mita doesn't sugarcoat the current reality. DEI is under attack, and companies are quietly rolling back progress. But her advice is clear:
“Get your resumes ready. The market will swing back. [...] And take care of your mental health so you can plug in when you need to and actually take action.” - Mita Mallick
She calls on underrepresented employees not to shoulder the burden of fixing broken systems alone.
“It’s not your job to fix a system that’s broken. You alone can’t do it.” - Mita Mallick
And she offers a very specific tool for resistance: Vote with your wallet.
“I’m not shopping at Target anymore. I accidentally bought something and returned it. I am a proud Costco member. Whatever money I have, I’m thinking about how I want to spend it.” - Mita Mallick
5) Loyalty is Not a Leadership Strategy
Too many leaders hoard talent instead of developing it. Mita shares a story about a boss who called her a “rat” for exploring other internal roles, even though she had been told the assignment was temporary.
“He was a talent hoarder. The idea was, ‘You leave when I say you leave.’ That’s not leadership. If you love someone, you let them go - internally or externally.” - Mita Mallick
Let people grow, and they’ll return as allies, not hostages.
6) Burnout Culture and the “Always the Bridesmaid” Trap
One of the most dangerous traps for women of color in leadership?
Over-functioning.
“Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Always number two, never number one.” - Mita Mallick
Many of us internalized the message: just work harder. Outwork everyone. Be helpful. Be seen.
“I took on so much office work and non-promotable tasks. Sometimes I did it to myself, but often others knew I’d say yes. And it never got me promoted.” - Mita Mallick
Olivia jumps in to validate how this plays out for Black women especially:
“We’ve been groomed from girlhood to sacrifice ourselves for everyone . You sacrifice for your job, you sacrifice for your family, you sacrifice for your spouse. You sacrifice, sacrifice, sacrifice.” - Olivia Cream
7) Midnight Emails and Missed Humanity
The book’s title, The Devil Emails at Midnight, isn’t just clickbait. It’s a metaphor for time misuse and mismanagement in leadership.
“Time is the most precious commodity in our relationships. This leader never had time for me, except between 10 PM and 1 AM. That’s when she dumped her inbox out.” - Mita Mallick
Mita doesn’t judge flexible schedules, but she urges leaders to ask:
Are you coaching, or just commanding?
“ When you're a leader, your number one job is to create more leaders. Are you just sending orders over email, or are you actually making the time to coach and teach people?” - Mita Mallick
8) Coaching Culture > Command Culture
Leadership isn’t about power - it’s about presence.
“I often say leadership is an honor and a privilege. Yes, it’s hard. But what better way to make a positive impact than to lead people?” – Olivia Cream
“People don’t want to be managers anymore. They’re opting out. I hope this book makes people want to lead again and see it as a joy, a privilege.” – Mita Mallick
If we want to inspire the next generation of leaders, we need to model healthier behaviors. That starts with presence, boundaries, and clarity of purpose, not performative busyness.
This episode is more than a deconstruction of workplace toxicity - it’s an invitation to lead differently. Mita challenges us to examine not just the bad bosses we’ve had, but the leadership habits we carry.
“I profile 13 bad bosses. One of them is me.” - Mita Mallick
That self-awareness is the heart of real transformation. As Olivia and Archita underscore, leadership isn’t just about KPIs or promotions—it’s about people.
“You have the great privilege of touching so many lives. We have a true responsibility to make sure we’re making those lives better, not worse.” – Olivia Cream
If you enjoyed this conversation, here are a few more episodes you might like:
Episode 60: Debunking Corporate Myths to Transform Workplace Culture with Mita Mallick
Episode 71: Speaking Up in the Workplace with Animah Kosai
Episode 80: Strategies for Women to Thrive in Corporate Spaces with Kisha Wynter
To hear the full conversation, scroll all the way up and tune into episode 93.
About The Hosts: Archita And Olivia
ARCHITA
Archita Sivakumar Fritz is the Host and Producer of the Embracing Only Podcast. Archita is a MedTech and Life Science Strategist. She is a LinkedIn Top Voice for her insights into product strategy and nonprofit management, and the creation of inclusive cultures that champion a 'speak up' philosophy.
Following a successful 19+ year corporate career she now helps C Suite across organizations as a Fractional Product Marketing Leader through her company Ready Set Bold.
She works with individuals with 10+ years of corporate experience to find new paths away from toxic or underappreciative environments, enabling both personal fulfillment and broader organizational impact.
→ Grab your FREE resource to build your career transition here: https://embracingonly.com/cubicle-escape-blueprint
→ If you want to work with Archita you can reach out to her here: www.architafritz.com
→ Book her as a speaker, moderator, or coach for your next company event or workshop.
OLIVIA
Olivia Grant Cream is the host and producer of the Embracing Only podcast. Nothing makes her happier than providing a platform to women who are changing the world.
Olivia is a proud US Veteran and HR Leader who is passionate about changing the face of corporate America by helping underrepresented people reclaim their power and live the life of their dreams.
She is an advocate for transitioning military members seeking second careers in the corporate landscape.
Olivia is a proud Jamaican and enjoys mentoring, coaching, classic cars, and nature. The way you tell your story online can make all the difference.
→ You can work with Olivia here: www.oliviacream.com
→ Book her as a keynote speaker or moderator for your next ERG or company event.